Dear anyone,

There must be something wrong with me. Some kind of gloom has fallen over me lately, casting the whole world in a negative light. Sometimes it seems like this gloom is almost viscous and it just bogs. me. down.

I don’t get it. I have everything going for me right now. A safe, happy home where everything I need is provided for. A family that I genuinely enjoy spending time with. A 4.0 GPA at a prestigious college. A boyfriend who loves me and puts up with my annoying quirks. A best friend who I have known more than half my life.  An internship that is furthering my professional career.

I write these things down, and from the outside, it looks like my life is proceeding in a straight line forward. Everything is going to plan.

Why then do I feel so discontented? Why do I have this sense of anxiety permanently living right below my diaphragm? It just sits there and worms its way through my whole body. I can feel it right now, and I’m short of breath a little bit, ready to fight or flee.

I wish I knew, but I don’t.

Sometimes I just get in these depressive phases, I guess.

Love,

Allison